Where there are babies, there is poop.

  Have you ever had something happen in your everyday life (completely unrelated, I might add) that made you think of a forgotten memory? I seem to have these moments a lot.

  I'm a very forgetful person, the kind who says "oh I won't ever forget that", and the kind who doesn't keep a journal. Naturally, I forget about the things that I "couldn't forget". So, here is a little blog about forgotten memories that have somehow come to light once again.

  Most of the time, I remember things in the most "opportune" times, such as when I'm trying to go to sleep. The other night, I was laying in bed, listening to the steady thrum of our trusty box fan, when I thought of a time when the baby really was a BABY. He was 2 months old (maybe? I really should keep a journal...), and I was laying on the floor, with him sitting on my stomach, his back propped against my legs. We were talking and smiling, you know, average baby stuff, when he decided it was time to take a load off in his diaper. Now, as any mother would know, baby poop defies all laws of physics. Somehow, he managed to push ALL his poo out the leg of his diaper, and onto my clean white shirt, with only a smidgen actually in his diaper. A scratch. That was it. The rest was on my, as stated above, CLEAN WHITE SHIRT. Needless to say, that shirt has bit the dust. Oh, the many joys of motherhood.

  My dear husband and I always talk before we go to bed. Except on the days we're both so tired, we're asleep before our heads hit the pillows. One night, the subject of our hospital stay came up. Or more accurately, what we ate at the hospital. When having a baby, you can't eat until after the baby is born. Nobody tells you this, so if you're in labor for a long time, your life pretty much sucks. I remember the last meal I ate before checking into the hospital, and I remember the first meal I ate after the baby was born. Before we went to the hospital, the one thing I had been craving like none other was....a sausage, egg, and cheese biscuit from McDonald's. Yes, I said it. McDonald's. Then I checked into the hospital and was given ice. Ice. Really? Is that supposed to fill a pregnant lady up? I don't think so...By the time the baby came, everything was closed, including the hospital cafeteria, so no food for me. I had watched the hubby eat 2 meals while I was in the hospital, and after 13 hours of labor, I was absolutely starving. The first meal I got, was hospital bacon, eggs, and toast. I'm pretty sure the eggs weren't really eggs, and the bacon must have been microwaved, but I was starving, so they tasted delicious anyway. At my description of how the normally nasty hospital food tasted delicious, the hubby laughed. For some reason, he found it hilarious that I thought the food delicious. I was probably delirious, but I didn't care. I probably would have eaten a brick if they had given it to me. Another joy of motherhood.
  Back to the subject of baby poo. The baby was only a week or two old, and the hubby was supposed to change the baby's diaper. I had to go to the bathroom, and it really is true that once you become a mother, you have no time to yourself in the bathroom. As I'm about to wash my hands, I hear the husband screaming my name. As a mom, my first thought was something was wrong with the baby. I sprang from the bathroom, just to find the husband's pants completely covered in baby poo. I about died laughing. Apparently, in my husband's words, he took the diaper off and it was like a poop cannon exploded. There was no stopping it, and it got everywhere. I still have to smile every time I think of the incident. Oh, goodness. Being a parent is the best.

  So here are a few tidbits from my crazy life, just in case you wanted to know. I really should start writing these things down...